10 of the funniest quotes about Leeds

Rich in history, with a thriving cultural scene and plenty of glorious countryside just on the doorstep, it’s no surprise that Leeds has become one of the most popular cities in the UK.

And with its undeniable Yorkshire charm, the city has inspired many an amusing quip which sum it up perfectly.

Here are a few of the best.

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“What is going on with the loop? I’m all for having an inner city ring road, but can we go both ways around it?

"I had to go to the theatre – I could see the theatre from my hotel – it took me 25 minutes going around the whole city to get back to my hotel!”

Michael McIntyre

After bringing his Comedy Roadshow to Leeds in 2011, comedian Michael McIntyre was less than impressed with our road system.

His confusion and frustration at the loop is sure to resonate with any Leeds resident who has experienced the pain of driving through the city centre.

“Leeds is quite laid-back. That’s why I live there now.”

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Matthew Lewis

The Leeds-born Harry Potter star, famed for portraying Neville Longbottom, wasn’t tempted by the hustle and bustle of London, when he had the peaceful charm of his hometown to return to.

Comedian Leigh Francis was born in Leeds, and loves its nightlife (Photo: Shutterstock)

“Good boozers in Leeds!”

Leigh Francis

Best known for portraying Keith Lemon, Leeds actor and comedian Leigh Francis has plenty of praise for his roots – particularly the abundance of great pubs and bars in the city.

“I don’t write my jokes, I have to do it on stage – it’s the only way you know that it’s working, so I just do loads of warm ups and I always come to Leeds City Varieties as part of that process.

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“I love the honesty of people from Yorkshire. When you’re trying to test material, you want people to let you know if it’s funny or not, and here they’ll definitely let you know!”

John Bishop

Leeds City Varieties is a popular choice for comedian John Bishop to trial run his new material. If there’s one thing he’s learnt from his many visits to the city it's that Leeds folk aren’t afraid to tell the truth.

Geri: "We were top-and-tailing in this tiny house in Kirkstall, mucking in together, eating chips and, erm, what do you call those things?"

"Scraps!" laughs Mel B.

"That's right, scraps, love those, " says Geri.

Mel B: "We didn't go out in Leeds though, it wasn't quite as happening 10 or 15 years ago as it is now."

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Spice Girls

They may have risen to super stardom, but in the early days, life in the Spice Girls wasn’t so glamorous, as an overnight stay at Mel B’s childhood house proved.

While the nightlife and culinary offering in Leeds has improved over the years, you still can’t beat a helping of scraps from the fish shop.

'How many Cobblers do you need to have in one shopping centre?' (Photo: Shutterstock)

“There are cheap rents if you’re prepared to move up North. I was in Leeds the other day and I asked a girl there how much she paid in rent, she told me an amount so low I couldn’t even understand the figure. I was like, ‘What is that, per minute?’”

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Nick Dixon

Yorkshire folk are well-known for being thrifty with their money, so this comedian’s bafflement at rent prices in the North may seem odd to many Leeds residents.

“Brudenell Road baby! They certainly know how to party in Leeds.

“It would be lunch time and you’d go down the road to the pub and have a few drinks. I don’t know how they do it – I’m not a huge drinker, so if I did that I’d usually be asleep by three.

“All I remember coming back from the pubs on a late night is my buddies wanting to go for a pasty and there’d inevitably be an older woman with her hat on and a little apron, and she’d be like, ‘Would you care for a pasty love? Or a cuppa? Ta love!’”

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